The Dissector

The Nitpicker #21.

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

Alright, so it took me three weeks instead of one to finish this column... but to my defense, there's 52 nits in this column, about three times the amount I usually put inj a post. You'll find this column filled with Civil War fallout (and I do mean full); as well as some DC goodness, with Dynamite Entertainment mixed in to balance it out a little.

These are all the nits that I found in comics released in the month of March, although one or two might be from February, and probably one is from April... more april goodness in the next post (hopefully in less than a month). Also, coming very soon, 52 Special, after it ends.
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"SOME PEOPLE SAY IT'S A POOR MAN'S STTAR WARS"

TITLE: Battlestar Galactica: Zarek.

ISSUE: 02 of 04.

CULPRIT: Unknown (whoever writes legal print).

NIT-TO-PICK: On the credits page, in the small print legal text that every comic has, it reads "Gallactica" instead of "Galactica". Funny, I didn't notice this until checking this page for the next nit.

By the way, I was only looking at that because I wanted to see the actual notation for the title (not the logo on the cover or at the top of this page), because I guessed it was "Battlestar Galactica: Zarek", but it wasn't, it doesn't have the colon... yet on Dynamite Entertaintment's webpage it's billed both as it is in this book, and as "New Battlestar Galactica: Zarek".

Ah well, I decided to go with what I wanted, and what makes more sense... Battlestar Galactica: Zarek.

NIT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar, just a typo, and in one of the most harmless places ever... or is it? Actually, I just discovered that they repeated the error on issue 4; I didn't check the other issues... but I'm guessing they did this the whole series... what about the other Galactica books? Good question... this gets bumped up to a 3 for repeated offense; and I'm e-mailing Dynamite Entertaintment to let them know. I wonder if they're doing it with the other Galactica books...
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"OH, THE HARDSHIPS OF GUERRILLA WARRIORS!"

TITLE: Battlestar Galactica: Zarek.

ISSUE: 02 of 04.

CULPRIT: Brandon Jerwa (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 14, we see where and how revolutionary Sagittaron leader Tom Zarek has been hiding since he went underground: wearing a fancy suit and hanging out at a posh apartment in a skyscrapper? Huh?

How in hell is he there, when he's leading a revolution that has to steal weapons from the government to sustain itself? It looks as if there's been some part of the plot that has been deleted from the book...

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars, it doesn't make sense and it makes the story confusing.
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"WE HAD TO SELL OUR COSTUMES SO TAR PIT DIDN'T MAKE US HIS BITCH..."

TITLE: Outsiders V3.

ISSUE: 46.

CULPRIT: Judd Winick (writer) and/or (most likely) Carlo Barberi (penciller).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 10, the narration describes Iron Heights Penitentiary, and it's metahuman dungeon (dungeon, yes, I'm sure that's how the Department of Correctionals likes to refer to it); the Pipeline, where supervillains are forced to "(...) remain in the costumes that once represented bravado, and now only suggest their absurdity."

Yet, on panel three, you can see Double Down and Cicada, who're wearing what looks like ordinary orange prison outfits, as opossed to Tar Pit who... well, we can only see him from chest up, but I think he's nekkid, as he goes around when he's outside (don't worry, we cant' see his... tarstick), so I guess that is his supervillain "costume".

Now, as far as I know, Cicada and Double Down don't wear orange costumes when they're doing their supervillain thing outside of prison.

NIT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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"WHO CARE'S, HE'S JUST A WALKING PILE OF TAR!"

TITLE: Outsiders V3.

ISSUE: 46.

CULPRIT: John J. Hill (letterer) or Carlo Barberi (penciller).

NIT-TO-PICK: Same page, same panel, Tar Pit's name is spelled Tarpit... now, I don't have a comic handy to check this, but most web sources I've found have him as Tar Pit.

NIT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar.
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"DID I SAY THAT? OR WAS IT YOU?"

TITLE: Outsiders V3.

ISSUE: 46.

CULPRIT: John J. Hill (letterer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 17, panel 5, the word balloon that contains a line obviously spoken by bumpy-headed-inmate (I'm not going to look up his name), is clearly positioned as if it was Captain Boomerang II's.

NIT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars, it's quite a goof-up, but it doesn't substract from the ability to read the story.
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"I WONDER WHY SUPERMAN, GREEN LANTERN AND FLASH AREN'T THERE..."

TITLE: The Mighty Avengers.

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Frank Cho (penciller) or Tom Brevoort (editor) and Aubrey Sitterson (assistant editor).

NIT-TO-PICK: I was going to include this on my end of Civil War special, but then I decided that it wasn't Civil War proper; yes, it is a CW consequence, but it's not a direct aftermath, like The Confession was.

Anyhoo, on the double spread on pages 7 and 8, Iron Man brings up images of a gazillion superheroes on a wall of monitors; he's discussing with Ms. Marvel who to choose for their new (or is that mighty) Avengers team. Actually, now that I realize it , I'm not so sure that Frank Cho drew all the images in the monitors, or they just copy and pasted from other books... which could make it the editors' direct fault.

In any case, the problem here is that, apart from showing images of villains like Bullseye (even if he's a Thunderbolt), Carnage or some other symbiote freak, the Green Goblin (who, as Norman Osborn, out of costume, now manages the Thunderbolts), and people who I seriously doubt would register; the monitors also show Captain Britain, who's not an American Citizen, and therefore not obligated to register (unless he wants to operate on American soil, and I kinda doubt it).

To make things worse, the monitors also show the images of two foreign rulers, Black Bolt of the Inhumans (who are currently, or who knows when, thanks to screwy continuity, at war with the US), and Namor of Atlantis (who was an ally of Captain America's anti-Registration side, and most likely still pissed off overall at the surface world, as he usually is). Oh, one more thing... there's a monitor showing the frickin' Hulk, who for all Iron Man knows is living a pacific existence in a distant alien planet (poor Tony, he doesn't know was coming to him... and he calls himself a futurist!).

It seems to me that somebody cut and pasted random faces fro mother books, a theory that is reinforced by the fact that a couple of monitors show pieces of other images, such as the monitor to the right of Green Goblin (top left corner of page 7), which shows an enlargement of the Goblin's lower face, or a monitor at the top of page 8 that shows a zoomed view of the monitor containing Captain Britain's face.

NIT-O-METER: 9 Bazzars, this whole comic sucksed arse, and this is one of the "highlights".
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"POOR SALAKK..."

TITLE: Green Lantern Corps V2.

ISSUE: 10.

CULPRIT: Moose Bauman (colorist, and regular guest in this column).

NIT-TO-PICK: Moose (how the hell can you go around in life with name like "Moose"? He probably gets the "where's Midge" joke a lot...), when are you going to realize that Salakk's skin is PINK, or at least hot pink, and stop coloring him reddish brown (like you do in this issue) or bright red?

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars, Moose is incurable.
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"NO, REALLY, POOR SALAKK!"

TITLE: Green Lantern Corps V2.

ISSUE: 10.

CULPRIT: Dave Gibbons & Patrick Gleason (pencillers).

NIT-TO-PICK: Not only our good buddy Moose (pffft!) miscolors Salakk, but the pencillers come along and screw up his head shape as well. Look at single-paneled page 3; they make it roundish, as opposed to pickle-shaped, as it is.

To be fair, it's not a problem with their knowledge of the character but with perspective, since in the following double-page spread, side and top views show him with a correctly-shaped head.

NIT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"MAYBE IF WE ALL STAND AND WALK NEXT TO KILOWOG, NOBODY NOTICE HOW HORRIBLY TALL WE ARE..."

TITLE: Green Lantern Corps V2.

ISSUE: 10.

CULPRIT: Dave Gibbons & Patrick Gleason (pencillers).

NIT-TO-PICK: On panel 5 of the aforementioned double-page spread, Kilowog walks in with five, yes, count 'em, five, other alien GLs... and they're all about the same height and build as he is. Anybody see what's wrong here? Yes, exactly. Kilowog is 8' 3" tall and weights 620 pounds... are these FIVE Lanterns as big as he is? Hmm.... somebody forgot how massive the 'Wog really is.

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars, not as bad as when somebody made Lockheed as small as Cyclops' head.
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"WHO'S NEXT, IRONMAN?"

TITLE: Knights Of The Dinner Table.

ISSUE: 124.

CULPRIT: Tony DiGerolamo (writer of "Looking At Comics" column).

NIT-TO-PICK: I said some time ago that I would stop even mentioning typos in KODT, but I was speaking about the comics themselves, not the columns in the magazine. Now, even the columns I ignore mostly (on terms of nits, that is, I do read them), because even if the magazine includes comics, most of the columns are not about comics.

"Looking At Comics", however, is obviously about comics. In this case, one of the comics Tony reviews is "Spider-Man/Power Pack #3", but he writes "Spiderman"... and everybody knows it's spelled "Spider-Man"!!!! Except for those damn Spaniards, who used to "translate" the name as "Spiderman", even going to the trouble of editing the cover logos...

NIT-O-METER: 3 Bazars, it might just be a typo... but it's not, because it repeats itself through the review...
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"FLAGS OF OUR COPPERS"

TITLE: Punisher War Journal V2.

ISSUE: 05.

CULPRIT: Matt Fraction (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 3, last panel, the wannabe cop named Ian states that "Cops and firemen don't have flags of their own? Au contraire, they do, for instance, the NYPD and the FDNY have their own flags, just click on the links.

Yes, I know, I uploaded those images to Wikipedia, along with the descriptions, and integrated them into the corresponding entries... but I found the images and the information elsewhere in the web, and decided to share it with the world.

This could be a mistake on the character's part, but we're talking about somebody who believes himself to be a policeman when he's only a citizen patrol volunteer or some sort of thing like that... he's obssesed with being a policeman.

NIT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars, a little bit of research doesn't hurt Matt...
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"THEY SHOT MFK!"

TITLE: Amazing Spider-Man.

ISSUE: 539.

CULPRIT: Axel Alonso (editor).

NIT-TO-PICK: When Spider-Man has Mary Jane register Aunt May (shot down by the Kingpin's sniper) in the hospital, he tells her to use May's maiden name "Fitzgerald"... but as far as we know, her maiden name is "Reilly". What gives?

Credit where credit is due, I did not realize this on my own, I only realized it after I read this post on Newsarama. Thanks BradE!!!!

Once more I go out of my way and point out an editor as the culprit. Why? Because in Newsarama's Cup of Joe for March 30, Axel Alonso said: "That was an error. Just slipped through the cracks. JMS emailed us to fact-check Aunt May's maiden name, and in a glitch, we gave him the wrong name. It was one of those "D'oh!" moments that just got past everyone here. We've fixed it for the second print and the trade."

Fitzgerald, as I found out the other day, is the maiden name of Mary Parker, Peter's mother. So, having too much Spidey knowledge actually made Axel and his people go wrong?

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars, Reilly being May's maiden name is the whole point of the Spidey-Clone calling himself Ben Reilly.
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"IT'S THE LONG LASTING WEB GOODNESS!"

TITLE: Amazing Spider-Man.

ISSUE: 539.

CULPRIT: J. Michael Straczynski.

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 24, Spidey recovers his cloth black costume from a webbing bundle under a gargoyle high atop a building. He says "I put this here a long time ago."... but his webbing disolves after an hour or so; even his current organic webbing can't last that long (the latest Spider-Man handbook says the natural webbing lasts for about a week)...

JMS should know better. In fact, in the same Newsarama column cited above, he says: "(... ) it's been established that Peter had to modify his original web fluid so that it dissolved within an hour to insure that nobody got trapped there for an undetermined amount of time and potentially died. Since we did not see the scene in which he puts the costume up there, I would submit to you that he used the unmodified, longer lasting webbing. Since each new batch has to be changed in order to make it last an hour, having the basic materials to put it there would not have been difficult."

I'm sorry, but I'm not buying. If there's a specific issue where that's stated, please show me, but I'm pretty sure that's a retcon. In fact, the whole reason Peter could not benefit financially from his invention was the fact that it can't last for more than an hour or so... I only recall this being true in Ultimate, but I haven't seen anything to prove what JMS says either.

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
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"WE JUST LOVE OUR LANGUAGE A LOT"

TITLE: Birds Of Prey.

ISSUE: 104.

CULPRIT: Gail Simone (writer) or Travis Lanham (letterer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 8, panel 1, the caption box says "Baku, capitol city of the former Soviet republic of Azerbaijani." Problem is, Azerbaijani is the language, or the people (sometimes also called Azeri), the country's name is Azerbaijan. Sorry Gail, you know I don't like to pick on you.

NIT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar, it might just be a typo.
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"HITCHIN' A RIDE"

TITLE: The Brave And The Bold V2.

ISSUE: 02.

CULPRIT: Mark Waid (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On this issue, Batman uses a civilian jet, piloted by someone working for Waynetech, to ferry him to Texas, jumping from it... doesn't Batman have his own plane?

NIT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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"THAT MEDDLESOME UN!"

TITLE: Checkmate V2.

ISSUE: 12.

CULPRIT: Greg Rucka.

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 21, Beatriz "Da Costa" Corvalho's father, Ramon Corvalho, a former Brazillian military officer responsible for torturing, killing, and making people dissapear under Brazil's military regime of the 70s, is arrested by UN representatives... but why would the UN interfere in an internal matter like that?

Both in Argentina and Uruguay, although I do not have information regarding Brazil, former dictatorial officers responsible for crimes have been tried in-country; sometimes countries even investigate matters together (since Operation Condor, in which Colonel Corvalho participated, involved cooperation between the dictatorships in Argentina, Uruguay, Paraguay, Brazil and Chile). But all arrests and prosecutions have been made locally, the UN has no jurisdiction.

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars. Rucka can do better than this....
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"FROM WHAT WESTERN TO ANOTHER..."

TITLE: The Lone Ranger V5 (even if it's Dynamite's first volume, let's just honor history).

ISSUE: 01 (Director's Cut).

CULPRIT: Brett Matthews (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 12, on his comment about the violence in the book, Matthews mentions that The Ranger "was always going to be an earnest, TRANSITIONAL Western"... what's a "transitional Western"? Or did he mean "traditional Western"?

NIT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars, it might have been a typo (like "tranditional") that the spell check caught and turned into "transitional".
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"IM' PRETTY SURE THIS IS WRONG..."

TITLE: newuniversal.

ISSUE: 04.

CULPRIT: Warren Ellis (writer) or VC's Rus Wooton (letterer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 15, panel 2, Izanami Randall (who received the powers of Nightmask), says "I m' a damn American (...)". I guess the apostrophe doesn't go there, does it?

NIT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar.
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"IT'S THE EDITOR'S FAULT... THE TV EDITOR..."

TITLE: Fantastic Four.

ISSUE: 543 (story: C'mon, Suzie, don't leave us hangin').

CULPRIT: Dwayne McDuffie (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: The story is set post-Civil War, and it shows a documentary made to commemorate the anniversary of the first appeareance of the FF... and it's well established that even if parts of it were filmed before CW, it's released afterwards.

But when showing parts of an interview with Spider-Man, he's billed as "Spider-Man, aka "Peter Parker", Avenger"... uhm... as far as the public is concerned, he's a former Avenger... same thing for Luke Cage, who's presented as "Avenger and former FF team member", and Wolverine, who's billed as "Avenger and X-Men member". Unless, of course, they mean the "Secret Avengers", an out-of-character term used to refer to Captain America's faction in CW; first (to my knowledge) used in-character by Iron Man in Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

Also, Spider-Man is wearing his classic costume, not the Iron Spider armor, or his black costume, so this confirms that the interview was taped after he defected from Iron Man's side, and before the end of the war; or before he got his Iron Spider costume. In any case, the captions should say "Former Avenger" for all three of them; or "Secret Avengers member".

Even if the war just ended 3 days ago, Spidey and Luke Cage have been outlaws for quite some time, and even in 3 days the network would fix the captions before airing the documentary.

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"IT'S IN HERE EYES!"

TITLE: Fantastic Four.

ISSUE: 543 (story: C'mon, Suzie, don't leave us hangin').

CULPRIT: Paul Mounts (colorist).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 33, new team members Storm and the Black Panther reveal themselves... and Storm's eyes are glowing yellow.

WTF???! Storm's eyes are blue, regular human white-and-blue eyes, and when she uses her powers (WHEN-SHE-USES-HER-POWERS!), they turn solid white. Not yellow. Not glowing. Not when she's just standing there.

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
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"WHO CARES ABOUT BRAZILLIAN SUPERHEROES, ANYWAY?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Damn... this book was one hell of a heavy read. It actually reads like an official report of the post-CW Marvel 616 Earth. It's 64 four densely packed pages of almost pure text, with few images (one or two per page), and absolutely no comic pages.

It has a "head writer" and "coordinator", but only one plain "writer"; and of course, someone in charge of "proofing coordination". One hell of a job guys, seems like you fell asleep while doing it (just as I was falling asleep while reading the book); there's exactly 26 nits in a single book... that's almost 1 nit every two pages!. I probably missed a few, in fact, as I simply write down page numbers when I'm reading the book and find a nit, sometimes I go back to the page to read it and write up the nit, and I can't remember what had caught my eye... it happened a couple of time with this book.

That's gotta be a record, even talking about a 64 pages long book made up entirely of text. Not to mention the fact that it says that it's been 6 months since the SHRA was passed, and most book make it feel like it was a month at the most, maybe two (and Irreedemable Ant-Man even goes so far as saying the war lasted only one week).

The first nit I found is on page 7, where Iron Man refers to South America. He cites several South American heroes killed by Zeitgeist, including one "Captain Forsa" from Brazil. The right name for the hero should be "Capitão Força", and if you want to translate it, translate the whole thing into "Captain Force" or "Captain Strenght". Of course, this nit should probably go as a nit first found on Alpha Flight V1 #78, where Capitão Força first appeared, but I never read that book...

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars, you know how I hate when they get non-English languages wrong.
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"THEY'RE ALL DEAD, AND THIRD-WORLDERS, SO WHO CARES?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: What was I saying about further nits that had escaped me in this book? While researching for the previous nit, I found one more nit. Same page, same freaking paragraph, same damn sentence... the Guatemalan superhero also killed by Zeitgeist is referred to as "Macambra", when her name is actually "Ojo Macabra" (which should actually be "Ojo Macabro", but that's something else).

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars, use reference material people.
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"YOU'RE STILL UNREGISTERED?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 8, on Arachne's profile, it states that she's an "Unregistered superhuman (...); charges of SHRA violations dropped in exchange for participation in Omega Flight"

So, she was apprehended, right? Don't you get de facto registered if you are captured? More so, wouldn't that be necessary if you are sent in an exchange program of sorts to work in another country's superhero team? Not to mention the fact that Arachne had already worked for the government as a member of the C.S.A.'s Freedom Force, and even got her powers from C.S.A.' experiments.

NIT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"THE MUTANT MISADVENTURES OF CLOAK AND WHATSHERNAME"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 16, profile for Cloak & Dagger, Dagger is referred to as "Dazzler" in the last sentence. Funny, seeing how people in the Marvel Universe (and probably real people as well) sometimes confuse her with Dazzler...

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars. People, you're getting PAID for doing this, this is not some Wikipedia, or some fanboy's website!
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"LAYOUT? WHAT'S THAT?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Also in Cloak & "Dazzler"'s profile; the last line of the first column is too close together, the justification for the whole book sucks, whith four words in one line with huge gaps, and eight in the next one with little space between each word. In this case, however, it's ridiculous; there is like only twice the space between word and word than there is between each letter of a given word.

NIT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars, just for the shoddy layout of the whole book.
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"HE JUST PULLED OUT HIS ILUMINATTI MEMBERSHIP CARD"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Dr. Strange's profile, on page 21, reveals that he was granted some measure of immunity from the SHRA, "inasmuch as his activities could by definition not be limited to American territory and interests." and his legal status is "pending", because his "duties as designated protector of the entire Earth dimension exempt him from many facets of the SHRA".
What?!?!? So just because he doesn't limit his activities to the US, he's exempt from the SHRA? Most superheroes, particularly super teams, are dedicated to the defense of the whole planet, or anybody, anywhere, that requires their help... only the more local heroes, with more limited resources, are limited to one specific city or area.

And it's not about the magic either, because there's other magic-wielding heroes registered or unregistered, who are not exempt.

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"EVEN THE REST OF HER POWERS ARE INVISIBLE!"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Page 22, Fantastic Four's profile, the Invisible Woman's powers are described as "can render herself and other objects wholly or partially invisible by mentally bending all wavelenghts of light in the vicinity around herself or the target in question."

Huh? What happened to her power to proyect forcefields??!?! We're only talking about one of the most important characters in the Marvel Universe, heck, it's one of the first four characters we can call part of the Marvel Universe, and were not added to it by retcon.

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars. Simply outrageous.
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"YEAH, WE AIN'T GOT NO PROOF, BUT HE'S RUNNING WITH THEM!"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Page 30 shows Iron Fist's profile, and within said profile it says that the hero is presumed to be the Daredevil impostor that fought on Captain America's side during the CW; but there are no conclusive proofs. It also says that he claims that the Iron Fist who's part of the ilegal Avengers team is an impostor.

If there's no confirmation of him being the Iron Fist in Luke Cage's Avengers, why does his group membership state he's a member of the "Avengers" (quotation marks are not mine); with no "presumed" or "unconfirmed"?

NIT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars.
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"MY NAME'S IRON MAN, HE'S IRON FIST, IT'S LIKE WE'RE BROTHERS! I'M TEMPTED TO LEAVE HIM ALONE IF HE'S HUNG THE PAJAMAS!"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Again, Iron Fist's profile. Why would he be allowed to run around unregistered, why would his status be "determination awaiting legal decision", and why is there "some temptation to leave him undisturbed if he has retired his costumed identity"?

Even if he has retired from superheroing, he is a superhuman, he has superhuman abilities, and as such, must register. He might not be required to get a superhero license, if he claims he's not going to operate as one anymore, but he needs to register.

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"WELL, CYCLOPS' GOT HIS OPTIC BLOWS..."

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Still on page 30, Iron Man's armor is said to be armed with "repulsar" rays. It's "repulsor", and they do this again on War Machine's profile on page 57, so it's not a typo.

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars, this is like saying that Thor has a magic sword.
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"CITIZENSHIP? THE KINGPIN IS NOT BOTHERED BY SUCH TRIFFLE MATTERS!"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: You can hardly turn a page in this book without finding a nit (or two, or three) , huh? On page 31, Kingpin's profile omits the fact that he was released from prison, stripped of his American citizenship, and exiled to Europe.

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
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"AND MY PROBLEM WITH THIS IS THAT THEY FORGOT PART OF THE"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Prowler's profile, on page 43, ends like this "(...) and his cape can be expanded via a network"; nothing else, no period to mark the end of the phrase (which even then would make no sense), no continuation of the sentence in the next page.

NIT-O-METER: 9 Bazzars.
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"OUR FUNDING USED TO BE PROVIDED BY THE EUROPEAN COAL AND STEEL COMMUNITY, BUT THEY CLOSED DOWN..."

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Page 47 features the profile of S.H.E. (Super Heroes Of Europe); a stupid name for a team, if you ask me; but it mentions that major funding comes, in part from, the "Hero Organization of the European Community". There's no such thing as the "European Community", the former European Economic Community is now called the European Union.

NIT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars, it might be called differently in the Marvel Universe, but I doubt it.
<-------------------------------->
"STAN WHO?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: On the same page, She-Hulk's profile states that she works for "Goodman, Leiber, Kurzberg & Holliway", when in fact the firm is called "Goodman, Lieber, Kurtzberg & Holliway".

Of course, the firm's first three senior partners are named after Martin Goodman (Marvel Comics first publisher), Stan Lee (born Stanley Lieber) and Jack Kirby (born Jacob Kurtzberg). I didn't know the name of the firm, since I don't follow She-Hulk's adventures; but I noticed the reference and thought odd that they'd mispell Lieber and Kurtzberg.

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.... no, 10 Bazzars! You can't spell THOSE names wrong!
<-------------------------------->
"JUMPP AROUNDD!"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Still on page 47, in the last paragraph of She-Hulk's profile, part of ther powers are "ascend 600 feet in a single jumpp".

NIT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar.
<-------------------------------->
"SO, SPIDEY, HOW DIDJA GET YOUR POWERS, ANYWAY?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 50, Spider-Man's profile states him to be a mutate of "basis unclear"... first of all, I'd say that many people in the Marvel Universe (whenever I say Marvel Universe, I'm of course speaking of the main continuity, 616), particularly those in the superpowered community, or at the very least someone like Iron Man, would know that Spider-Man's powers come from being bitten by a irradiated spider.

Not only that, but only a few lines further into the profile, it says "Following mutation from an irradiated spider bite", with no qualifiers to signify uncertainty, such as "presumed" or "supposed".

NIT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"... AND WHEN WAS IT THAT YOU GOT YOUR NEW POWERS?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Also in Spidey's profile, it says about his powers that he developed new powers (including his new organic webs) as a result of additional mutation that happened "prior to joining the previous incarnation of the Avengers".

WTF?!?!?!? Spider-Man was already a member of the Avengers when "The Other" storyline took place. This is outrageous, they can't even get simple facts straight... and they get paid for doing this?!?!?!

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"I THINK YOU HATH MISSED WORD!"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: First of all, I have to complain about Clor's (the Thor clone/cyborg) profile being under "Thor", and Stark referring to him as Thor throughout the profile, as if he were the actual Thor.

But that's not the nit, the nit is that in the second paragraph it says "use this genetic material to clone of the Thunder God." Missed a word? Verily!

NIT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"I SNEAK IN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO MAKE MYSELF A SANDWICH. TONY HAS THE BEST STOCKED FRIDGE THIS SIDE OF THE HUDSON RIVER"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Page 59, Wolverine's profile cites his bases of operations are the Xavier Institute and Avengers Tower. Uuuuh.... if he's no longer a member of the official Avengers team (a fact that's also mentioned in this same profile), how is his base of operations Stark Tower?

NIT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars, copy and pasting from other profiles is not a nice thing to do...
<-------------------------------->
"YOU DARE FORGET MOST OF MY SUPERPOWERS?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 60, X-Factor Investigations' profile describes one it's members,. M, to be precise as "super-strong M"; which is a gross misunderstatement, since M posesses several other powers, among them telepathy and super-intelligence.

NIT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars, this is not as big as forgetting Invisible Woman's forcefields.
<-------------------------------->
"PERCENTAGES, SHMENTAGES"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Also on page 60, on X-Factor Investigations' profile the number of mutants that were depowered on M-Day is said to be "over 90%"; but on the same page, on the X-Men's profile, it says it's "over 99%".

Yes, more than 90% could be more than 99%... but Marvel has a history of not making up their minds as to the figures for M-Day. You'd think they could at least keep it consistent within the same page.

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars, not for gravity, but for repeated offense.
<-------------------------------->
"YOU MEAN YOU HAVEN'T READ THAT STORY YET? OOPS..."

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: The Young Avengers' profile, on page 62, states that their base of operation is Camp Hammond, and their major funding comes from the US government. This means they've join the Initiative. When? Because only Stature had joined the pro-Registration forces; Wiccan was captured by them, and the rest of the team was still on the loose and operating without registering.

I can understand if they decided to register, every last one of them... but it hasn't been shown in any story yet, nor any explanation is given in the profile. Giving incomplete information in this kind of profile is bad enough, but spoiling a not yet published story is worse.

NIT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"IT'S A WHOLE 'NOTHER EARTH"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 62, still on the Young Avengers' profile, it says that Iron Lad is from "Other-Earth". He is actually from "Other Earth". What's the difference? Well, I guess this is why they call me The Nitpicker!

Iron Lad hails from Other Earth, aka Earth-6311; while Other-Earth, aka Earth-712, is the house of the Squadron Supreme. See? There is a difference.

NIT-O-METER: I'd give this just 1 Bazzar for being a typo, but a typo that changes what you are referring to completely (it's a completely different parallel Earth!), that deserves at least a 5.
<-------------------------------->
"WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO CALL YOU ANT-HONY?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Page 66, the Civil War Files Appendix; El Muerto's secret ID is given as "Juan-Carlos Estrada Sanchez"; but Spanish first and middle names are not hyphenated.

NIT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars, although this is probably Peter David's fault, as the writer who co-created the character in the first place; and the name is spelled the same in Marvel.com's profile
<-------------------------------->
"HOW ABOUT I CHANGE YOUR LAST NAME TO FLAMINGI?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer), and Michael Hoskin (proofing coordination).

NIT-TO-PICK: Still on the Appendix, on page 67 we've got Terminizer, who's civilian name is given as Luis Guiterrez. Guiterrez is not a last name, it should be Gutierrez.

NIT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars, even though it probably is the fault of Steve Gerber, who created the character; I found it in one site as "Guitterrez", which is even worse.
<-------------------------------->
"MR. PRESIDENT, WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW A SECRET? OR A FEW HUNDRED?"

TITLE: Civil War: Battle Damage Report.

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Anthony Flamini (head writer/coordinator) and/or Ronald Byrd (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: And my last nit to pick with this book: the fact that this is supposed to be a report for the US president; coupled with the fact that Tony Stark stated at the end of Civil War that he became director of S.H.I.E.L.D. to be the one in charge of safeguarding the secret identities of the heroes who registered.

Why is this a problem? Well, in his report, Tony reveals the identity of EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER whose identity is known. Oh, sorry... not everybody's identity... he withholds the identity of Initiative characters like MVP and Trauma. Thanks a lot, Tony!

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"WE'RE USING SOME TECHOLOGY FROM KRYPTON THAT CLARK FOUND IN HIS FORTRESS, TAKES OUT AROUND 30 YEARS OF YOUR LIFE!"

TITLE: Action Comics.

ISSUE: 847.

CULPRIT: Renato Guedes (penciller, inker, colorist).

NIT-TO-PICK: I'm sick and tired of this. Superboy Prime punches non-withstanding; Birthwrong aside, Ma and Pa Kent are 60ish; if not 70ish... Clark's about what, 36? And they found him as a baby, when they were already kind of old to have kids of their own?

Say they were 40.... they should be at least 76, or if they were 35 (and that's not too old to have kids for a woman, not to mention a man); 71... but in this comic they look like they're 50 or so... but with absolutely no gray hair... not to mention the fact that Pa Kent has a full head of hair!!!

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars; this is completely outrageous, it's even worse than the last time they did this!
<-------------------------------->
"DEJA VU... NO, TOO DIFFERENT TO BE A DEJA VU..."

TITLE: Black Panther V4.

ISSUE: 26.

CULPRIT: Reginald Hudlin (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: This is actually the editors' fault (yes, it's ALWAYS the editors' fault, but this is different). Same thing that happened between Civil War and Punisher War Journal happens here, the scene we saw in Fantastic Four #543; that of Mr. Fantastic and the Invisible Woman telling Torch and Thing they were going to have replacements for the former, happens differently on page 18 of this issue; from dialogue, to art, to clothes they're wearing, to action... EVERY detail is different!

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars, if they have editors, why don't they coordinate these kind of things?!?!?
<-------------------------------->
"I'M NOT FEELING MYSELF TODAY"

TITLE: Black Panther V4.

ISSUE: 26.

CULPRIT: Francis Portela (penciller).

NIT-TO-PICK: On the first panel of page 23; the Thing (who'd been adequately drawn in the previous pages) looks more like Concrete than like himself. His arms are deformed, he's barely got shoulders, and his neck is gone, with his head squashed until it becomes wider than it is high... only to be correctly portrayed in the next panels and pages!

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars, sloppy. Yes, I know, I like the word sloppy... don't read into that, please...
<-------------------------------->
"WE SPEAKING ENGRISH!"

TITLE: Blue Beetle V3. Or V7, if I count the four series starring Dan Garret, published by Fox Feature Syndicate and Charlton Comics... what do you think? I think Blue Beetle deserves the same honor to tradition the Lone Ranger does. So V7 it is, from now on.

ISSUE: 13.

CULPRIT: John Rogers (writer) and/or Phil Balsman (letterer).

NIT-TO-PICK: Well, this is one of my pet peeves when it comes to mistakes in comics. I'm obviously not talking about Beast's shape, because this is a DC book. Moose Bauman does not color this book, so it's him working his magic here. And even though Ma and Pa Kent live in Kansas, which is relatively close to Texas, it's not about them looking their age.

Yes, you've guessed it! Somebody miswrote something in Spanish!!! On the last panel of page 8, Jaime Reyes (the current Blue Beetle, for those of you not paying attention) and his friend Paco, surprise Jaime's father with the re-opening of his autoshop/gas station. And there's a big, fat sign that reads "SE HABLAR ESPAGNOL", which is meant to mean "WE SPEAK SPANISH".

Now, there's two wrong things with this. First, and more obvious to those who speak Spanish, is the fact that the word "Spanish", in Spanish, it's spelled "español". That little "n" with a hat (seriously, that's how my first grade teacher referred to it when I learned how to write) is called "eñe", you can do it by doing ALT+164 (or 165 for capital) in ASCII codes, and it sounds just lik an "n" with a "i". So "español" sounds like "ehs-pa-nee-ol"; and "mañana" ("tomorrow") sounds like "ma-nia-na".

Second, and less important, is that the usual phrase you put in this kind of signs is "SE HABLA ESPAÑOL", which means "WE SPEAK SPANISH". By conjugating the verb "hablar" ("to speak") like they did, they actually wrote "I KNOW HOW TO SPEAK SPANISH."

Barring the fact that this kind of lettering is too clearly seen in the page (not just some scenery) to not have been done by the letterer (under orders from the writer), the artists are not at fault. It wasn't penciller Rafael Albuquerque, because even if he's Brazillian and might not speak Spanish, he didn't draw that page. And David Baldeon, penciller for this page, is from Spain, so there's no chance in hell he'd write that and make that mistake.

Yes, they might say that, in character, neither Jaime nor Paco (who is, obviously, also Hispanic) can write Spanish very well... but I don't think even them (who have been shown speakin Spanish) would write it like that, not with the hundreds of like signs you're bound to see in shops all over a border city like El Paso, TX, where 76.62% were Hispanic or Latino in the last (real world) census.

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars, I wish writers did a little bit more of research when writing characters of and ethnicity other than their own.
<-------------------------------->
"HOW DO YOU WRITE 'LET'S GO' IN MEXICAN?

TITLE: Blue Beetle V3.

ISSUE: 13.

CULPRIT: John Rogers (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: OK, this does it! On page 19, first panel, Paco says "VAMANOS!" which is intended to be "VAMONOS!", that is, "LET'S GO!". ARGH!!!!!!

NIT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars. I can't take it anymore... ok, ok... I'm a little trigger happy... just 5 Bazzars...
<-------------------------------->
"I'VE GOT A MONSTER COLD, AND I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING..."

TITLE: Fantastic Four.

ISSUE: 544.

CULPRIT: Dwayne McDuffie (writer).

NIT-TO-PICK: On page 9, Black Panther is shown eavesdropping on Mr. Fantastic and Iron Man by using a bug, when he's only standing a few feet away. The Black Panther has superhuman senses, good enough to know if somebody is lying, for example... and he can't listen in a conversation near him without tech?

Yes, they can say that Tony Stark had some kind of jammer that prevents superhuman senses from listening in on the conversation, but a) they didn't establish that, and b) it would also jam listening devices.

NIT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars, you shouldn't get to write characters you're not familiar with. What's next, Storm having fun inside a coffin?
<-------------------------------->
Well, that's it for this post, and the average Bazzars is 6.8; second highest ever, and only one point below last week (our all-time high). See you all later!