Monday, August 18, 2008

The Dissector #85.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

"But I can touch you... in a special way." Red Ghost simian against Wakandan troops.

Welcome to yet another installment of The Dissector; this time for the comics released on the week of 07/23. I have to start, sadly, with a bad news. Those who follow my column know that I'm very fond of, and have been inspired by cartoonist Jeremy Rizza's humor/comics/fashion blog Blockade Boy; which, unfortunately, he has decided to end. The link will stay on my blog's sidebar; and I encourage all of you to go and read back on his pasts, since it's very funny and also shows a great knowledge of comics. Since Blockade Boy is no more; I also recommend you check his upcoming webcomic Viking Zombie Boyfriend, which starts today.

That said, let's move on to the column itself; last column's DT! was spotted by both DrSilent (over at ICS.net) and Snarf5181 (at my blog); since ICS' comment feature doesn't have timestamps, I'll credit both. It was that Bart Allen's Kid Flash costume had a red hood, instead of a yellow one. Congratulations on your second badge, DrSilent, and Snarf5181, you just made Lieutenant in the HDSC! Now, make way for The Dissector's Picks Of The Week! Best Book Of The Week was Uncanny X-Men #500; it was just a geekgasm... while the Worst Book Of The Week was Number Of The Beast #8; thank God that snorefest is over. On to the dissections, please:
<-------------------------------->
"ESCRIMA FOR ME!"

TITLE: The Brave And The Bold V3 (DC).

ISSUE: 15.

CULPRIT: Mark Waid (writer).

DISSECTION: Hawkman calls Nightwing's escrima sticks (or bastones) "escrima"; which is the name of the martial art.

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars. Carter knows weapons.
<-------------------------------->
"MAGIC WANDS."

TITLE: The Dissector (Studio Robota).

ISSUE: 84.

CULPRIT: MaGnUs (writer).

DISSECTION: Snakebyte noticed that I wrote "Wand's"; when I meant "Wands'". Good job Snake, one more badge, and you make Commander, first one in the HDSC.

DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars. If only I had time to proofread...
<-------------------------------->
"HOT LIST LAST WEEK."

TITLE: Green Lantern Corps V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 26.

CULPRIT: Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza (editors).

DISSECTION: The "Hot List This Week" and the DC Nation column is the one from are from the week before.

DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"NEXT, IN A COMPLETELY UNRELATED COMIC!"

TITLE: Justice League Of America V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 23.

CULPRIT: Adam Schlagman (assistant editor) and Eddie Berganza (editor).

DISSECTION: Not a good week for Adam and Eddie when the last page of books is concerned. The legal indicia and "Next in..." at the end of the book are for Superman #678...

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"IT'S GETTING COLOSSAL!"

TITLE: The Legion of Super-Heroes V5 (DC).

ISSUE: 44.

CULPRIT: Jim Shooter (writer).

DISSECTION: Once again, Colossal Boy's powers are wrong.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars (I jacked it up one point). Also, his hair is colored incorrectly.
<-------------------------------->
"W.H.Y.?"

TITLE: Marvel Comics Presents V2 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 11.

CULPRIT: Rich Koslowski (writer).

DISSECTION: U.S.Agent... not USAgent... and not only in the story.

DISSECT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"YEAH, IT MAKES MORE SENSE THIS WAY, BUT..."

TITLE: New Warriors V4 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 14.

CULPRIT: Beth Sotelo (colorist).

DISSECTION: Jubilee's eyes are brown, when they should be blue.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"LIVING IN A DC NATION..."

TITLE: Robin V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 175.

CULPRIT: Jeanine Schaefer (associate editor) and/or Mike Marts (editor).

DISSECTION: Not Adam and Eddie, but again a wrong DC Nation and "Hot List...", this time from a month before or more.

DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars. I wonder if these dissections should be credited to the editors, or to some sort of design/production team.
<-------------------------------->
"SECRET DISSECTION!"

TITLE: Skrulls! (Marvel).

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Ronal Byrd (writer), or any of the other various writers not credited individually for each profile.

DISSECTION: Spot me this one, among the shapeshifters:

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars. I was even kind enough to crop the other profiles, so you could focus.
<-------------------------------->
Our average this week was 5.1 Bazzars in eleven dissections; pretty low, if I may say so. Speaking of dissections; as you might now, following the 2007 Autopsy Awards; I started keeping track of the dissections credited to each author; each book, and each company. I'll throw you an interesting tidbit, do you know who the writer with the most dissections so far for the next Autopsy Awards is? Well, it's not Chris Claremont, to my surprise. It used to be a tie between Geoff Johns and... me. But now, Geoff is one dissection ahead. Before we leave, Moments Of The Week! First up, the LSH gets a new member, M'rrisey:

Or as I like to call him; Lawyer Lad (because Legal Lad sounded... wrong). Next, in Super Friends, Gorilla Grodd turns all humans on Earth into monkeys and apes:

Some don't even notice the difference... Then, Mongul is shown the full force of the Green Lantern Corps!

"Aaarh!" indeed. And now, a moment I would never thought I'd see:

Jubilee (Wondra) kills! And I think I shrunk that pic too much... Finally, MTV's Cribs does DC:

Nice place, Bruce. That's it for now, until next week, I'll be on the outlook for more dissections, because (almost) nothing escapes...

THE DISSECTOR!

5 comments:

Lucas Siegel said...

Both Karolina's parents are Majesdanian, so she's not a half-breed; she's a full blooded Majesdanian.

MaGnUs said...

You got it right Lucas... still; someone got it first over at the ICS; but I'm crediting you both because I didn't say anything here to let you know guessing time was over.

Lucas said...

Rock! I actually noticed that last month when I read through the one-shot for Troy and I's skrull column at the 'rama

MaGnUs said...

Ah, nice. I haven't read Newsarama in quite some time, to be truthful....

MaGnUs said...

Comments originally posted on ICS.net, right after the column was posted:

DrSilent: What half breed? She's pure blood as far as I can recall....
(psst... typo in your third dissection)


Martín "MaGnUs" Pérez: You got it right DrSilent; and yes, I wrote "is the one from are from"... again, if only I had time to proofread... Two badges for you, buddy.


DrSilent: Yowza, looks like I'm on a roll!
What do badges do anyway? I saw some people gaining ranks and whatnot... Is there a manual? A Master Plan to Take Over the World, with an army of near-sighted contrarians? The people want to know.

Also, are you interested in submissions if I happen to find some of my own? :x


Martín "MaGnUs" Pérez: DrSilent; the badges are to advance your rank in the Honorary Dissector Scout Corps; the ranks are as follow:

High Admiral 47-infinite
Admiral 41.46
Rear Admiral 36-40
Vice Admiral 31-35
Commodore 26-30
Captain 21-25
Commander 21-25
Lieutenant Commander 16-20
Lieutenant 6-15
Ensign 1-5

I am the only Grand Admiral; of course... and you; with your five badges; are an Ensign, but just one shy of Lieutenant-hood. Yes, I do take submissions, in fact, that is another way to earn badges and advance your ranks!

E-mail your submissions to lordmagnusen at gmail.com; please mark the comic name and issue on the topic; if I haven't read the book and plan to, I don't like them spoiled (and if I spot the dissection before reading your e-mail, you of course don't get credited).