The Dissector #58.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

"I'm Donna Troy, bitch." New Earth Donna Troy to (I suppose) Earth-3 Donna Troy, Countdown To Final Crisis #15.

Welcome to yet another Dissector column, for the comics published on 01/16. Last week's Dissect This! was correctly guessed by Snakebyte over at the ICS.net forums, saying that Doc Samson's hair length is related to his strength, so it would be stupid of him to leave his hair short. A discussion ensued, and I while recognize that this is not the first time Doc is seen with shorter hair after WWH, until it is said, either on panel, or by somebody at Marvel that his strength level no longer depends on the length of his hair, I will consider this a dissection. Snakebyte, take a badge!

The Dissector Picks Of The Week will be, as we're still catching up, short and sweet. Best Book Of The Week Is Booster Gold V2 #6. Great story and dialogue by Geoff Johns and Jeff Katz, and eye-catching, (though not fantastic) art by Dan Jurgens and Norm Rapmund. Plus, the MOT you'll see at the end of the column.

Worse Book Of The Week is Star Trek: The Next Generation: Intelligence Gathering #1. Lazy and uninspired plots, sloppy art, even when the writers and artists involved are capable of more (and I talk about all IDW's Star Trek comics so far, you know what I think of them), none of the IDW trek books have stood out so far. I've reached the conclusion that IDW, and the creators involved (my apologies if this not the case) have decided to give this half an effort at best, confident in the knowledge that, as a franchise comic, it will sell a given amount of issues.

On another matter, on this particular issue, even if I can't find a real flaw with the following concept, or I don't understand enough science to find such a flaw, I despise some of the technobabble they've used: "Storing all the Federation's data is an enormous task, essentially a giant data backup. For all the isolinear storage, we've used holodeck technology to construct and extradimensional tesseract. The tesseract-a four dimensional cube-allows us to exponentially increase the size of the archive within the tesseract (...)." Ew... however, I must say that this story did read like a TNG episode... even if it was a boring one.
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"MACKEY MOUSE."

TITLE: Checkmate V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 22.

CULPRIT: Greg Rucka (writer) and/or Travis Lanham (letterer).

DISSECTION: One of the Mademoiselle Maries is referred to as "Maqui", when it's "Maquis" or even "Maquisard", if you want to refer to a single member of the group. A "maqui" is an evergreen shrub, Aristotelia chilensis, from Chile.

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars. Oh, and of course, Fire's name is spelled wrong again.
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"ANYONE HERE SPEAK FRENCH? OR KRAUT?"

TITLE: Checkmate V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 22.

CULPRIT: Eric Trautmann (penciller).

DISSECTION: If said Maquis was wanted by the Gestapo, why is the poster in English, instead of French (or even German)?

DISSECT-O-METER: 9 Bazzars.
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"GLAMAZONS WITH HIGH HEELS."

TITLE: Countdown To Final Crisis (DC).

ISSUE: 15.

CULPRIT: Pete Woods and/or Tom Derenick (pencillers).

DISSECTION: I have no idea how tall Holly Robinson is supposed to be, but Harley Quinzel is 5'4", and Mary Batson is 5'6", yet both Holly and Harley are about a head taller than Mary. Even if she's barefoot (which I don't think so, not yet), and they're wearing combat boots (and I think they're just wearing Greek-style sandals), they can't be so tall in comparison with her.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars. Also, Jason Todd's clothes are different again.
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"I CAN'T SEE!!!"

TITLE: The Flash V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 236.

CULPRIT: Freddie E. Williams II (artist).

DISSECTION: John Stewart's eyes have no pupils or irises in some panels.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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"DOC SAMSON, "DOC" AS IN THE DWARF FROM SNOWHITE..."

TITLE: Hulk (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Ed McGuiness (penciller).

DISSECTION: From last week's column, in the Dissect This!, the Guvnor correctly spotted (although it wasn't what I was looking for) that the heights are wrong. She-Hulk is supposed to be 6`"7, and Samson 6`6", but she looks a good foot taller than him. Another badge for the Guvnor!

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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"I'M HALF THE GOD I WAS."

TITLE: The Incredible Hercules (Marvel).

ISSUE: 113 (Gods, how I dislike renaming of books, even though I'm enjoying this one).

CULPRIT: Greg Pak & Fred Van Lente (writers).

DISSECTION: Ares says that after Hera killed Herc, Zeus made him a demigod. No, he made him a GOD, Herc was already a demigod, by virtue of his being Zeus son with a mortal woman.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars. Ares is drawn without pupils or irises, to boot.
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"THE WHATCHAMACALLIT FIELD."

TITLE: Justice League Of America V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 17.

CULPRIT: Dwayne McDuffie (writer).

DISSECTION: Vixen refers to her powers as originally coming from the "morphogenic" field, the correct word is "morphogenetic".

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars. Also, someone indirectly refers to Superman and Wonder Woman as human beings (they're not, or Superman at least is not).
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"PRISON DISSECTION."

TITLE: Marvel Comics Presents V2 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 05.

CULPRIT: Staz Johnson (penciller, Wrecking Crew story).

DISSECTION: Alright, this one is so easy it's embarrassing:


DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars. Oh, and of course, we get USAgent....
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"WIL-WHO?"

TITLE: New Exiles (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Chris Claremont (writer) and/or Tom Orzechowski (letterer).

DISSECTION: Yes, because we so much needed a "New" Exiles book.... by the way, the Wright brothers were Orville and WilbUr, not WilbEr...

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars, it might be a typo, but it's an important historical figure.
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"I WENT TO MICHAEL JACKSON'S PLASTIC SURGEON."

TITLE: New Warriors V4 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 08.

CULPRIT: Jon Malin (penciller) and Marte Gracia (colorist).

DISSECTION: I can accept that Beak can look "hunkier" after his de-mutation, but Angel, his wife, was definitely of African descent, for God's sake! Now she's barely even mestizo in skin tone, and not remotely African in features!

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars, increasing from last time, as it's gotten worse. Some of her kids are still showing signs of being part black. Not that I use "African descent" and "black", because I'm not sure if her black ancestry is from the US, or another part of the world.
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"YOUR COSTUME ROCKS!"

TITLE: New X-Men V2 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 46.

CULPRIT: Humberto Ramos (penciller).

DISSECTION: Rockslide's costume is again drawn incorrectly.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars. Anole's eyes are also miscolored.
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"DOOM-STATUS!"

TITLE: Penance: Relentless (Marvel).

ISSUE: 04 of 06.

CULPRIT: Paul Jenkins (writer).

DISSECTION: Really, so Iron Man knows that Namor is "in cahoots" with Doom again, and no big deal was made of it in none of the ten bazillion books Tony appears in? Hell, when did they learn Nitro was in Latveria? For that matter, this book presents yet a new flag of Latveria (see below). How many different flags does Latveria have? I can't consider this a dissection, because Latveria probably has a flag for the country (not counting the one from before Doom's rule, and the one from Lucia von Bardas' interim rule), one for the "House of Doom", one for Doom's army, one personal flag for Doom, etc, etc, etc...

But still, in that link above, you can see at the bottom the flag with the fist and the lightning bolts, which was presented as the flag of the country in Marvel Atlas, and while the handbooks are hardly perfect, they must be regarded as Marvel's official information. Personally, I think it should have the armored fist and lightning bolts motif, but a green, red and black design as the one presented in this book, or the first one in the link above.


DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars.
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"DOOMTV."

TITLE: Penance: Relentless (Marvel).

ISSUE: 04 of 05.

CULPRIT: Paul Jenkins (writer) and/or Paul Gulacy (artist).

DISSECTION: Does Dr. Doom really need to speak to Reed Richards (who's using a state of the art visual phone, like a Star Trek communications screen) with a full TV studio apparatus? I know they want to emphasize that Eastern Europe former communist block to Latveria, but not inside Doom's castle, not in what's supposed to be his private communications suite!

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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"DOOMBOOM!"

TITLE: Penance: Relentless (Marvel).

ISSUE: 04 of 05.

CULPRIT: Paul Jenkins (writer).

DISSECTION: Doom is warned by one of his underlings that "the American spy satellite" will "detect the presence of fissionable materials" and that if they "lose containment, the Americans will know for certain we are on the verge of developing a full-fledged nuclear facility!". Are we supposed to believe that Dr. Doom did not have nuclear weapons? And that he even needs them?

DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars. Not an error per se, but just poor writing. I expect more of Jenkins, and I miss his Newsarama column.
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"THE QUESTION IN THE FINAL FRONTIER."

TITLE: Star Trek: The Next Generation: Intelligence Gathering (IDW).

ISSUE: 01 of 05.

CULPRIT: David Messina (artist).

DISSECTION: Why, why must these Star Trek comics come without character faces!!! I understand a faceless figure here and there, if it's lost in the background? But for the only character speaking in a panel?

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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"HUH?"

TITLE: Star Trek: The Next Generation: Intelligence Gathering (IDW).

ISSUE: 01 of 05.

CULPRIT: Scott & David Tipton (writers).

DISSECTION: Now, even if they're inside of a tesseract, why does "the interdimensional nature of the tesseract" cut off "all conventional communications"? Just because it suited the writers? They're inside of a holodeck representation of a data storage array, something that, by definition, requires communication methods to store such data...and why is the tesseract's nature "interdimensional", when at first it was described as "extradimensional"? Make up your minds...

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars.
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"LIKE XAVIER."

TITLE: Star Trek: The Next Generation: Intelligence Gathering (IDW).

ISSUE: 01 of 05.

CULPRIT: Ilaria Traversi (colorist).

DISSECTION: Why are Picard's eyes colored green??!?!

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars. Come on Ilaria, he's based off a real person!!!!!
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"I'M BADASS LIKE THAT, THAT'S WHY I HAVE A BEARD. AND SOME FACIAL HAIR TOO."

TITLE: Star Trek: The Next Generation: Intelligence Gathering (IDW).

ISSUE: 01 of 05.

CULPRIT: Scott & David Tipton (writers).

DISSECTION: Riker (and presumably Data) goes armed to a mission on board of a Federation space station; where no hostile beings were expected. Now, landing parties or away teams are supposed to be armed, but Riker and Data only go to this station for Data to act as an expert in positronic matrix artificial intelligences, and Riker goes with him because... well, he's the first officer or some other reason like that. There's no reason why they should be armed.

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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There we go... the average for this week was 6.4 Bazzars, just a regular one... First Moment Of The Week, the Blue & Gold are back together:


Oh yeah! Next up, and not so much of a shocker after a month and half of published, but the secret is out, Angel is now mortal!


Well, it was to be expected if Gunn is a vamp now... That's it for now, until next week, I'll be on the outlook for more dissections, because (almost) nothing escapes...

THE DISSECTOR!

The Dissector #57.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

"Come on, everybody! There's got to be an abandoned playing card factory around here somewhere." Joker leading his half of the prisoners of the penal planet, Salvation Run #3 of 8.

Still on the catch up, this is the column for the books published on 01/09... I'm still more than one month behind... I must start the column with a short remembrance for French penciller and colorist Stephane Peru, who passed away... he was only 27 years old. He deserved more time to make his mark.... but he was apparently as good a person as he was an artist (and he was pretty damn good).

This week's Dissector's Picks are gonna be short, as I've been doing in these catch up columns. The Best Book Of The Week was issue 4 of Atomic Robo, with clean art, great stories, excellent jokes (Robo's feud with Stephen Hawking cracked me up) and the final proof we needed that Robo is the Hellboy of this decade: he fights Rasputin! I close my case!!!!

The Worst Book Of The Week was Infinity Inc. V2, issue 5; the art in the backup story is slightly better than before, but the rest of the book (including both stories) is not worth your money, at all. I almost forgot about last week's Dissect This!; The Guvnor Paul C correctly guessed that Ra's al Ghul's eyes shouldn't be red, they should be green. Guvnor, you're hereby promoted to Lieutenant in the HDSC, as this is your sixth badge. Now, the dissections!
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"IT'S A BRAND NEW DAY, AFTER ALL..."

TITLE: Amazing Spider-Man V1 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 546.

CULPRIT: Morry Hollowell (colorist).

DISSECTION: So, this was the first Brand New Day issue. I like it, it's a good read; I can say that now that about 6 issues have passed... and I could have say so after this first issue. What makes it even better is that you know that, at some point, Pete's going to get back with MJ. You just know it.

But of course, there's also gotta be dissections, and the first one is that JJJ's hair is colored perfectly brown, as if he wasn't a day over 40... when he's probably pushing 60, if not 70.

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars.
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"I CHANGED BETWEEN PAGES."

TITLE: Countdown To Final Crisis (DC).

ISSUE: 16.

CULPRIT: Pete Woods & Tom Derenick (pencillers, I'm not familiar enough with their art to know who did what).

DISSECTION: Power Ring's costume is different on page 11 than what it is on page 3.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"THEY WERE KILLING MY FEET!"

TITLE: Countdown To Final Crisis (DC).

ISSUE: 16.

CULPRIT: Pete Woods & Tom Derenick (pencillers, I'm not familiar enough with their art to know who did what).

DISSECTION: Jason Todd is wearing ankle boots, actually almost shoes, instead of the kick ass, knee-high combat boots he's been wearing so far.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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"WHAT'S UP WITH THE 'DO, GUY?"

TITLE: Green Lantern Corps V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 20.

CULPRIT: Patrick Gleason & Carlos Magno (pencillers, same as before).

DISSECTION: Guy Gardner's haircut is wrong.

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars.
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"AAAAK OR AKK?"

TITLE: Green Lantern Corps V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 20.

CULPRIT: Peter J. Tomasi (writer) and/or Steve Wands (letterer).

DISSECTION: Salaak again.... and again. Make that two dissections in this case...

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"I'LL CALL HIM ARTHUR, AND HE'LL LIKE IT."

TITLE: Green Arrow / Black Canary (DC).

ISSUE: 04.

CULPRIT: Judd Winick (writer).

DISSECTION: When Ollie's friends discuss what is being done to find Connor's attackers, Flash says that "Arthur is in the water.", talking about Aquaman. Problem is, they have no contact with think Aquaman, who's now the "Dweller of the Depths", and I doubt they'd refer to his most recent stand-in as "Arthur" so familiarly (who also has vowed to never use the name "Arthur" again, going just by "Joseph".

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars. Also, Speedy's eyes are miscolored.
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"GAMMA DISSECTION."

TITLE: Hulk (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Ed McGuiness (penciller).

DISSECTION: Something's wrong with this picture...


DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"A FLASH HAS DYED."

TITLE: JLA: Classified (DC).

ISSUE: 50.

CULPRIT: Allen Passalaqua (penciller).

DISSECTION: Good, some John Byrne art! But why is Wally West's hair is colored blonde?

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"THEY ARE ITALIAN MEN WITH GUNS, WHO CARES?"

TITLE: Marvel Atlas (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01 of 02.

CULPRIT: Michael Hosking (head writer/coordinator), Anthony Flamini, Stuart Vandal, and Eric J. Moreels (writers).

DISSECTION: This is the best idea for a handbook in decades. It's full of information, very useful information (particularly for those of us who want to write, or that gamemaster Marvel roleplaying games)... but as you might have guessed, being chockfull of text, and having been made by the Marvel Handbooks team, it's also full of mistakes. I'll just highlight the more blatant or funny ones, and then I'll count the rest (behind the scenes). In case you're interested in knowing, it's got seven mistakes, that I could find, at least.

I am, however, happy because the world map shows Uruguay (although South America is covered in the next issue), and there's a fictitious country we neighbor with, apart from Brazil and Argentina, off the coast of the latter. The first error I'll be highlighting is that the writers consider the Carabinieri Corps of Italy as national defense; when they're the police force. They are also military police, and their Mobile Unit Division sometimes collaborates in the defense of national territory and in some military operations abroad, but the Carabinieri Corps as a whole is not part of the Italian national defense force.

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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"Ñ, PLEASE!"

TITLE: Marvel Atlas (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01 of 02.

CULPRIT: Michael Hosking (head writer/coordinator), Anthony Flamini, Stuart Vandal, and Eric J. Moreels (writers).

DISSECTION: Yet another one I want to call attention to, is that they're capable of writing "España" correctly, with an "ñ", in the first part of Spain's entry, but for the rest of the entry, they forget all the "ñ"s....

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"IT'S COMMUNISTS, WITH MAKE-UP!"

TITLE: Marvel Atlas (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01 of 02.

CULPRIT: Michael Hosking (head writer/coordinator), Anthony Flamini, Stuart Vandal, and Eric J. Moreels (writers).

DISSECTION: Want another one? Well, you know how dumb fanboys write "Rouge" instead of "Rogue"? And even Marvel's done it in the past? This time they wrote Khmer "Rogue" instead of "Rouge" (as in red, in French), in Cambodia's entry.

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"NAMES PEOPLE, NAMES."

TITLE: Marvel Atlas (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01 of 02.

CULPRIT: Michael Hosking (head writer/coordinator), Anthony Flamini, Stuart Vandal, and Eric J. Moreels (writers).

DISSECTION: Last one, Uluru in Australia is referred to as still being called "Ayers Rock".

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars, yes, its name might have remained unchanged in this reality...
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"DYE GODS!"

TITLE: The Mighty Avengers (Marvel).

ISSUE: 07.

CULPRIT: Justin Ponsor (colorist).

DISSECTION: Ares' hair is colored black, when it's been shown to be brown.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"A MATTER OF CHEMISTRY..."

TITLE: Salvation Run (DC).

ISSUE: 03 of 08.

CULPRIT: Matthew Sturges (writer).

DISSECTION: Chemo? Chemo is on the prison planet? Oh, no. Waller kept Chemo, and is using it, or at least a portion of it... but in any case, Chemo is a thing, not a sentient being, it wouldn't get sent to this place.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars. There are some other dissections, mostly wrong character designs, not worth mentioning.
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"MEA CULPA."

TITLE: The Dissector (Studio Robota).

ISSUE: 56.

CULPRIT: MaGnUs (writer).

DISSECTION: In my haste for posting last week's column, I forgot to run it through the spell checker... don't bother to look for them, because it was just about two hours after I'd posted the thing, so I decided to correct all mistakes. Still, for not running the spellchecker, I give myself this vicious dissection, and to Snakebyte, for calling me on them, a Honorary Dissector Scout Corps badge!

DISSECT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
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"AS DAYZ GO BY..."

TITLE: Superman V1 (DC).

ISSUE: 672.

CULPRIT: Comicraft (letterer).

DISSECTION: On the cover, Wellington Diaz (the inker), is credited as "Dias". And yes, it should be "Días" or "Díaz", but I'm letting that slide.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"GOODB YE."

TITLE: The Boys (Dynamite).

ISSUE: 14.

CULPRIT: Garth Ennis (writer) and/or Simon Bowland (letterer).

DISSECTION: Love Sausage says "dosvidanya", when Russian for goodbye is actually to words, "do svidanya".

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"I TOOK THE KENTS' ADVICE AND WENT TO THAT SPA..."

TITLE: Wonder Girl (DC).

ISSUE: 05 of 05.

CULPRIT: Sanford Greene (penciller).

DISSECTION: Wonder Girl's mother looks like she's the same age as her, nothing like she's supposed to look.

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
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"I'M NOT WEARING IT WHERE I'M SUPPOSED TO..."

TITLE: Wonder Girl (DC).

ISSUE: 05 of 05.

CULPRIT: Sanford Greene (penciller).

DISSECTION: Helena Sandsmark says she's wearing "the gauntlet of Atlas and sandals of Hermes", but she's drawn without the first object.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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"HE'S NOT FAMILY!"

TITLE: Wonder Girl (DC).

ISSUE: 05 of 05.

CULPRIT: J. Torres (writer).

DISSECTION: Wonder Girl refers to her half-brother, Hercules, as her mother's "nephew"... Zeus is Hercules' father, and also Wonder Girl's (which makes Helena and Hercules no relationship).

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"ROCKSLIDING OUT OF COSTUME."

TITLE: X-Factor V4 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 27.

CULPRIT: Scot Eaton (penciller).

DISSECTION: Rockslide's costume is drawn incorrectly.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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There, column almost over. Now, here are the moments of this week. First, from Teen Titans: The Lost Annual, we learn that JFK did not really die, but he actually leads the Starjammers!


Case closed! Then, from The Boys, we discover Love Sausage's weakness (he says "big titties are my Kryptonite"):


Hmm, I guess his power does lay in his Love Sausage. More from The Boys, Billy Butcher strikes out a lot of supertypes in one press of a button:


Messy... And finally, a sight you don't see often... Salakk laughs!


And Guy is opening a bar on Oa... sounds like sitcom gold to me! Back to the dissections, we had twenty-nine of them this column, with a (very usual) average of 6.3 Bazzars. That's it for now, until next week, I'll be on the outlook for more dissections, because (almost) nothing escapes...

THE DISSECTOR!

The Dissector #56.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

"Of course. More ninjas." Batman about Ra's al Ghul's minions, Detective Comics #840.

Alright, so the longest catch-up in the history of this column continues, and here are the dissections from the week of 01-04! It's short, both in amount of dissections and in the length of the write-ups, because there wasn't really much to write about. In fact, with a total of twelve dissections for the column (the closest ever to the ten dissection minimum I require before resorting to my vaults), I didn't even want to not write up a few of the dissections I had. Last column's Dissect This! was not solved by anyone (a lot of my readers are missing... MKF? Roy? guys??!?!), but I'll reveal it anyway: John Stewart's costume was incorrect; he was drawn and colored as having full green gloves, when he actually has some sort of bracelet thingies... I should have credited that issue's colorist too, because he could have fixed Freddie William's mistake.

I'm going to keep the Picks Of The Week short too; the Worst Book Of The Week was JFH: Justice For Hire #1. Plot out of a bad action comedy, and several spelling mistakes, not typos, but real horrors (as you can see in the dissections below), as if it was written by a 14 year old (and an uneducated one, at that). The art too, is juvenile, unprofessional, and just plain painful too look at. The Best Book Of The Week was, yes, you guessed it (if you're looking at a list of books published that week), it's Doktor Sleepless #4! Starting with magnificent covers by the series' artist Ivan Rodriguez, and a wrap variant by Raulo Cáceres (the latter perfectly capturing the mad scientist essence of the good Doktor), this book delivers just as it does month after month. Not all is visual bliss, for we also get more peeks at Dok's past, and yet another one at Nurse Igor's past. In fact, there is even some plot advancement in the shape of the angel construct! This series is a must read, real horrorshow (that means "good", for those of you that are ignorant about A Clockwork Orange). Alas, my droogs, on to the dissections, real skorry!
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"FORERUNAWAY!"

TITLE: Countdown To Final Crisis (DC).

ISSUE: 17.

CULPRIT: Karl Kerschl (cover penciller).

DISSECTION: Forerunner is on the cover, along with Monarch, as if they were still in cahoots... but he kicked her out weeks ago!

DISSECT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
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"IT'S NOT THE HEELS, BUT..."

TITLE: Countdown To Final Crisis (DC).

ISSUE: 17.

CULPRIT: Pete Pantazis (colorist).

DISSECTION: On page 15, Mary Marvel's (or should I say just "Mary"?) civilian shirt is colored wrong.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"OK, THIS TIME IT IS THE HEELS..."

TITLE: Countdown To Mystery #04 of 08 (DC).

ISSUE: 04 of 08.

CULPRIT: Stephen Jorge Segovia (artist for the Spectre/Eclipso story).

DISSECTION: Mary Marvel gets no heels, or at least, smaller than they should be. Still, Segovia gets props for panels like the one below. Yummy!


DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars, it's not Countdown.
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"WHERE ARE MY CAVES?"

TITLE: Detective Comics (DC).

ISSUE: 840.

CULPRIT: Paul Dini (writer).

DISSECTION: Batman is left "stranded" away from his Batmobile; and he has to steal some clothes and take a cab to get back home... but it's been shown in the past that's he's got backup Batcaves all over Gotham.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
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"IMMORTAL DISSECT THIS!"

TITLE: Detective Comics (DC).

ISSUE: 840.

CULPRIT: John Kalisz (colorist).

DISSECTION: Look below, tell me if you can find the problem.


DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
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"WHAT DOES SIGN SAY?"

TITLE: Exiles: Days Of Now And Then (Marvel).

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Carlos Ferreira (penciller, chapter 1).

DISSECTION: Odd, the indicia for this book just says "Exiles No. 1".... But the dissection is actually that the sign on the gates of what's left of the Xavier Institute on a particular Earth, it reads "INSTITUTE XAVIER FOR (...) STUDY (....)"... What the hell is "INSTITUTE XAVIER" supposed to be? The same way I complain about English-speaking writers not bothering to find out how something is said in Spanish; Ferreira here, who from his last name most likely is Hispanic, Portuguese or Brazilian, didn't bother to check, oh, I don't know, ONE OF THE SEVERAL HUNDRED MUTANT COMICS WHERE THE SIGN FOR THE XAVIER INSTITUTE FOR HIGHER LEARNING (or any of it's permutations) IS SHOWING!?!??!!??!

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"CLEAN YOUR PALETTES WITH THIS..."

TITLE: JFH: Justice For Hire (Creative Impulse Entertainment).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Jan Lucanus & Jan C. Childress (writers) and/or Atlantis Studios (letterers).

DISSECTION: Do yourself a favor, don't pick this thing up. But I dared read it, so I found a few dissections. The first one is that on page seven, the word "palettes" is used instead of "palates".

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"DON'T DO THAT, YOU'RE GONNA END UP LIKE THAT FOREVER!"

TITLE: JFH: Justice For Hire (Creative Impulse Entertainment).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Antonio Rojo (artist)

DISSECTION: Page 16, blank eyes on normal humans.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"IT'S ABOUT STATUES."

TITLE: JFH: Justice For Hire (Creative Impulse Entertainment).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Jan Lucanus & Jan C. Childress (writers) and/or Atlantis Studios (letterers).

DISSECTION: Page 19, the word "statuatory" instead of "statutory".,

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"HANG YOUR PLANE OVER THERE."

TITLE: JFH: Justice For Hire (Creative Impulse Entertainment).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Jan Lucanus & Jan C. Childress (writers) and/or Atlantis Studios (letterers).

DISSECTION: Page 25, "hanger" instead of "hangar".

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"STREET K!"

TITLE: Supergirl V5 (DC).

ISSUE: 25.

CULPRIT: Drew Johnson & Lee Ferguson (pencillers).

DISSECTION: Kryptonians wearing almost normal Earth clothes? Including Zor-El wearing carpenter pants?

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"I CHANGED MY SHADES."

TITLE: Uncanny X-Men (Marvel).

ISSUE: 494.

CULPRIT: Billy Tan (penciller) and Franka D'Armata (colorist).

DISSECTION: Prodigy's goggles are not the right shape or color.

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
Well, the average for this week was a nice 6.6 Bazzars, and let's take a look at the moments of the week, which are also scant. Ra's is smart because he's lived long, and he's learned to keep a receipt:


Smart fella. And the following one, is the creepiest moment I've seen in quite some time:


Uh, Norman, I think your meds need a little readjustment.... Or you just need a wee bit of Ludovico's Technique! That's it for now, until next week, I'll be on the outlook for more dissections, because (almost) nothing escapes...

THE DISSECTOR!

The Dissector #55.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

"CHUPA-WATCHAMACALLITS!! CHUPA-WATCHAMACALLITS!!! AUUGHH!! GET 'EM OFF ME!!!" A very distressed Human Torch, Fantastic Four: Isla De La Muerte.

Well, as promised, this is the first of my catch-up columns, with dissections from comics published on the week of 12/28. It saddens me to begin this column with the announcement of the death of writer Steve Gerber, a comic book legend. He passed away from complications that arose from his lengthy battle with pulmonary fibrosis, last Sunday, at the age of 60.

Gerber was a comic book fan like us his whole life, having started a fanzine, Headline, in his early teens, eventually finding work as a writer for Marvel in the early 1970s. He's best remembered from his Marvel days for his stints writing The Defenders and Man-Thing, and particularly as the creator of Howard the Duck. He also created Omega the Unknown, and wrote books like Shanna the She-Devil, the Guardians of the Galaxy and Son of Satan. He was one of the best examples of the Marvel writers of the 70s.

After he left Marvel in 1979, Gerber wrote some DC heroes books, and established himself at the forefront of the "independent revolution" of the 1980s, along people like his friend Frank Miller. Many of his plans didn't work out, sadly, and during the '80s he turned to writing for TV, both live action and animation, penning episodes for shows like Dungeons and Dragons, Transformers, Star Trek: The Next Generation (“Contagion”), G.I. Joe and Thundarr the Barbarian, which he created.

In the early '90s, Gerber was one of the founders of Malibu's Ultraverse, and for a time, wrote a handful of image titles. His work during that decade was eclectic, reflective of his sense of humor and personality. In the current decade, Gerber went back to Marvel to write a new Howard the Duck mini, under the MAX banner. His most recent work was with DC, first doing the acclaimed series Hard Time, and he was lately working on the Dr. Fate story appearing in the pages of Countdown to Mystery. He will be fondly remembered, and sorely missed.

This week's picks (don't know how to pick it up after this, but I'll try) will be quick. The Best Book OF The Week was Action Comics #860, great storyline, and great characterization of the legionnaires by Geoff Johns, and good art (despite Gary Frank's "insaneization of all characters). There. And the Worst Book Of The Week is Badger Saves The World #1, with a boring plot by Mike Baron, and horrible art by Kevin Caron.

On another note, I notified most of the winners of the Autopsy Awards, none of them, not even the ones who received a positive award, answered me. Except for one person... David Wiltfong, aka DragynWulf, from the Marvel Handbooks team... and he wasn't happy. I'll leave it at that, but some people don't have a sense of humor.

As the last item before going onto the dissections themselves, we have last regular column's Dissect This! Justin Garrett Blum correctly said that Nightwing's logo was drawn incorrectly.
<-------------------------------->
"SHORTCHANGED IN THE SUPERPOWERS DEPARTMENT!"

TITLE: Action Comics (DC).

ISSUE: 860.

CULPRIT: Geoff Johns (writer).

DISSECTION: Once again, Superman's powers are defined as "flight, super strength, super sensory powers." No invulnerability, heat vision, super speed, etc?

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"I'M USING THE SAME SUPERPOWERS ACCOUNTING SYSTEM AS SUPES."

TITLE: Action Comics (DC).

ISSUE: 860.

CULPRIT: Geoff Johns (writer).

DISSECTION: Timber Wolf's enhanced agility is also forgotten.

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"FORGET IT..."

TITLE: Amazing Spider-Man V1 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 545.

CULPRIT: None.

DISSECTION: So, One More Day... ah well, it wasn't THAT bad, and it will be eventually taken back in some way or another... But, my dissection has become moot since I checked it and I was the one who was wrong to consider it as one.

DISSECT-O-METER: Nil.
<-------------------------------->
"YO MAMA IS SO OLD...!"

TITLE: Brave And The Bold V3 (DC).

ISSUE: 09.

CULPRIT: Mark Waid (writer).

DISSECTION: André, of the Boy Commandos, says in French that "Une maman" has Brooklyn (Dan Turpin, if I'm not mistaken); as in a "mummy", since they're in a pyramid. Problem is, the word for "mummy", as in a preserved corpse, in French, is "momie".

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars, the joke does not work (the English speaking characters think he's saying that a "mommy" has Brooklyn) if he says "maman" instead of "momie".
<-------------------------------->
"SPIDER FACTS!"

TITLE: Various Marvel titles published the week of 12/28 (Marvel).

ISSUE: N/A.

CULPRIT: Unknown.

DISSECTION: Again, Nick Fury's files, this time, and this time the problem is that it has things that clash with Spidey's new status quo, for example, Nick Fury and Daredevil knowing Spidey's secret ID, when Marvel has said it's secret to everyone.

DISSECT-O-METER: 9 Bazzars for the clashing with Spidey's new status quo, plus one more at level 6 for stuff that can't be used at all by Nick Fury. This time, however, there are no real world information about his movies or such.
<-------------------------------->
"UUUH..."

TITLE: Countdown To Adventure (DC).

ISSUE: 05 of 08 (and previous issues).

CULPRIT: Adam Beechen (writer).

DISSECTION: Starfire and Animal Man are using solar panels to reflect sunlight; solar panels, by definition, absorb solar energy.

DISSECT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"RUN, IT'S EVIL DIANA!!!"

TITLE: Countdown To Final Crisis (DC).

ISSUE: 18.

CULPRIT: Howard Porter (artist for backup origin story).

DISSECTION: On the first page, Wonder Woman's bustier is colored dark blue or black.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"WE LETTERS HAVE TO STICK TOGETHER"

TITLE: The Danger's Dozen (First Salvo).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Gabe ElTaeb (letterer, backup story).

DISSECTION: On page 22, panel one, the words "it" and "Captain" have no space between them.

DISSECT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar.
<-------------------------------->
"NEXT UP, CAPTAIN-AMERICA."

TITLE: The Dissector (Studio Robota).

ISSUE: 53.

CULPRIT: MaGnUs (writer).

DISSECTION: I wrote "Iron-Man" instead of "Iron Man" in an Ultimate Iron Man II dissection.

DISSECT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"CORRETC THIS."

TITLE: The Dissector (Studio Robota).

ISSUE: 54.

CULPRIT: MaGnUs (writer).

DISSECTION: In the reveal of the Dissect This! for the previous column, I wrote "correctlyt " instead of "correctly", and I probably ignored it in the spell check, because it was between "Miss Kitty Fantastico" (whose "Fantastico" I should probably have added to Word's dictionary, there, just did it) and "Salakk" (ditto).

DISSECT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar.
<-------------------------------->
"THE THING? WHO?"

TITLE: Fantastic Four: Isla De La Muerte (Marvel).

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Tom Beland (writer).

DISSECTION: Good book, but the Thing talks about how in a small town in Puerto Rico people did not recognize him... the Fantastic Four are celebrities, and they've been on TV... and there's TV in Puerto Rico, I'll have you know.

DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars. All in all, no Spanish mistakes for an issue I was afraid would have tons... but the editor (and I think the artist too) are Hispanic, so that explains it.
<-------------------------------->
"I'M THE REPLACEMENT BUTTLER."

TITLE: Giant-Size Avengers V2 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Nelson (artist... yes, just "Nelson") and Andrew Crossley (colorist).

DISSECTION: Edwin Jarvis looks nothing like he should, particularly his gray hair at the point of Avengers history this story happens at.

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"SPEED DRAWING."

TITLE: The Flash V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 235.

CULPRIT: Freddie E. Williams II (artist).

DISSECTION: Take a look at the next panel, spot what's wrong here... no, it's not the horrible face on Wonder Woman...


DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"THOSE GUYS FROM THE SUICIDE SQUAD, THEY NOW WORK FOR THE MAN!"

TITLE: Gotham Underground (DC).

ISSUE: 03 of 09.

CULPRIT: Frank Tieri (writer).

DISSECTION: The Scarecrow says "Suicide Squad has worked for the government in the past (...)"... they've ALWAYS Worked for the government!

DISSECT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"WHAT'S UP WITH THESE RINGS?"

TITLE: Green Lantern/Sinestro Corps Secret Files And Origins (DC).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Geoff Johns & Sterling Gates (writers).

DISSECTION: Well, these handbook type issues always have potential for more errors, being mostly written text. This one has a lot of them than say, the infamous Civil War Battle Damage Report, but to the latter's defense, this one has much less text per entry.

First dissection is that the GL power rings are described as having the old 24 hour power limit. As far as has been established, the current rings follow Kyle ring's limitations, and his does not have that particular one. Also, it's said that a Lantern can carry his battery in an invisible state, and call it to him/her from anywhere in his sector, something that gives weight to my claims of mistakes when Hal Jordan has been shown not to have his lantern with him.

DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars, it might be that the new rings are not exactly like Kyle's, but saying explicitly would help.
<-------------------------------->
"GREN LAANTEERN."

TITLE: Green Lantern/Sinestro Corps Secret Files And Origins (DC).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Geoff Johns & Sterling Gates (writers).

DISSECTION: Once more, Salakk is called "Salaak". I even went and checked in his first appearance comic, and he's "Salakk", though, to the writer's defense, it's misspelled as "Salaak" once in the same book, and even "Sallak". Still, he's called "Salakk" the first two times he's mentiond and has been called "Salakk" all along (including Who's Who profiles), so until someone from DC comes out and says "Salaak" is the correct spelling, I'll keep saying it's a mistake. Of course, being a transliteration of an alien language, both spellings could be correct.

Guys, look at the image below. The interface is in Spanish, but the text is in English and the layout is the same as in the English language version of Word:


When writing a script that features Salakk being mentioned by name, you just need to add "Salakk" to your personal.dic file, so when "1" happens, then select "2" and press "3". Easy, innit? Hey, I just realized I myself wrote his name incorrectly at one point (and not to refer to your mistakes), and my spell checker caught it! If you don't use MS Word, I'm sure whatever you write your scripts (I know specialized script-writing software is used) has a spell check function.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"ION, NOT SO POWERFUL AFTER ALL..."

TITLE: Green Lantern/Sinestro Corps Secret Files And Origins (DC).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Geoff Johns (writer).

DISSECTION: Actually, this would go only to Geoff Johns, or maybe to the writer of Green Lantern Corps too, since it comes from the actual storyline and not this handbook. Sodam Yat got lead poisoning on Earth before receiving the Ion power, so now he needs to keep the ring on in order to prevent the lead from killing him. It makes no sense, Ion gives him the power of a ring, and even more!

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"ÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑ!"

TITLE: Green Lantern/Sinestro Corps Secret Files And Origins (DC).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza (editors), for lack of a better culprit..

DISSECTION: Cowgirl's entry art says it's been done by Daniel "Acuna", it's "Acuña". Please, respect the way someone's name is spelled.

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"IN HUNGRIEST DAY, IN MUNCHIEST NIGHT!"

TITLE: Green Lantern/Sinestro Corps Secret Files And Origins (DC).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Geoff Johns & Sterling Gates (writers).

DISSECTION: Schlagg-Man, Sinestro Corpsman for Sector 3493 (who incidentally, is named after editor Adam Schlagman, I just realized) is said to be a native of Bismoll, and it's strongly inferred that he shares the powers of the 30th century Bismoll. Now, most history seen, whether is old Legion continuity, or V4 (Valor seeding) continuity (although no mention is made in V5 Legion continuity) has it so Bismollians don't develop their abilities for a few centuries.

DISSECT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"IT MUST BE SOMETHING I ATE."

TITLE: Green Lantern/Sinestro Corps Secret Files And Origins (DC).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: One of the following: JD Smith, Art Lyon, Moose Baumann, Digikore, or Guru EFX (colorists).

DISSECTION: Schlagg-Man's skin is painted pink, when Bismollians look exactly like humans.

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"PLEASE, SPELL MY NAME RIGHT!"

TITLE: Green Lantern V4 (DC).

ISSUE: 26.

CULPRIT: Geoff Johns (writer) and/or Rob Leigh (letterer).

DISSECTION: Salaak, again.

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"AND STOP CUTTING MY UNIFORM!"

TITLE: Green Lantern V4 (DC).

ISSUE: 26.

CULPRIT: Mike McKone (penciller).

DISSECTION: Salakk's uniform boots and gloves are not drawn correctly, fingerless and toeless.

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars..
<-------------------------------->
"SUPERMAN WHO?"

TITLE: JLA: Classified (DC).

ISSUE: 49.

CULPRIT: Andrew Kreisberg (writer).

DISSECTION: At the end of the story, Superman and Lois Lane, possibly to avoid any eavesdropping (although Clark usually knows if there's anyone listening in) speak as though they're not married. However, Lois says "I know we don't know each other well", and as far as anyone is concerned, Lois Lane is one of the people who knows Superman the best.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"LIGHTNING, EVERCHANGING."

TITLE: JSA: Classified (DC).

ISSUE: 33.

CULPRIT: Staz Johnson & Mike Norton (pencillers).

DISSECTION: As usual, Jay Garrick's chest emblem is wrong.

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"HE'S BUT A SHADOW OF THE MAN HE WAS..."

TITLE: JSA: Classified (DC).

ISSUE: 33.

CULPRIT: Junior Thomas (writer).

DISSECTION: Alan Scott leaves the JSA's Christmas' Eve celebration, because his daughter is dead, and he has to spend Christmas Eve alone, and yadda yadda yadda. Hey, Junior, Alan's son, Obsidian, lives in the JSA's headquarters.

DISSECT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"CONTACTS?"

TITLE: The Legion of Super-Heroes V5 (DC).

ISSUE:

CULPRIT: Nathan Eyring (colorist).

DISSECTION: Light Lass eyes are colored green, instead of blue, as they should be. God, am I excited that Jim Shooter is back!!! And Francis Manapul isn't bad, either.

DISSECT-O-METER: 5 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"QOU VADSI!"

TITLE: Pax Romana.

ISSUE: 01 of

CULPRIT: Jonathan Hickman (writer, artist, and presumed letterer).

DISSECTION: This book is good, even though it's slightly hard to read because of it's layout... just a minor dissection, it reads "gaurd" instead of "guard" at one point.

DISSECT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar. By the way, here's a preview of this first issue.
<-------------------------------->
"I'M A SHAPESHIFTER, CHECK OUT MY QUESTION IMPRESSION!"

TITLE: Teen Titans V3 (DC).

ISSUE: 54.

CULPRIT: Eddy Barrows, Joe Prado & Greg Tocchini (pencillers).

DISSECTION: Page 10, panel four, why does Miss Martian have no face?

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"ÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑÑ!"

TITLE: X-Men: Messiah Complex - Mutant Files (Marvel).

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Any of the several writers.

DISSECTION: Ah, here I am again attracting the wrath of the Marvel Handbooks' team! Darwin's real name is given as Armando Munoz, when it's "Muñoz".

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
"THIS IS A NEW SWORD."

TITLE: X-Men: Messiah Complex - Mutant Files (Marvel).

ISSUE: One-shot.

CULPRIT: Any of the several writers.

DISSECTION: Several wrong things about Excalibur's entry, first of all, it considers the current incarnation of Excalibur as a separate one from the previous team (even though it shares one founding member, and one other later member), giving its first appearance as New Excalibur #5. I'd consider Professor X's Excalibur in Genosha (which I don't think was ever called that outside the book's name) a completely separate team.

The team roster includes Lionheart, who was never shown to actually join the team, and the former members section is of course lacking all the former members like Colossus, Nightcrawler, Shadowcat, Lockheed, etc. On another note, the Handbooks team at least acknowledges Morph as actually been Proteus.

DISSECT-O-METER: This counts as just one 7 Bazzars dissection.
<-------------------------------->
"THESE ARE KITCHEN KNIVES, ACTUALLY..."

TITLE: X-Men V2 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 206.

CULPRIT: Chris Bachalo (penciller).

DISSECTION: Warpath's knives looks nothing like they should.

DISSECT-O-METER: 3 Bazzars.
<-------------------------------->
So, let's go for the Moments of the Week, shall we? The first one comes from The Avengers Initiative #8, the Taskmaster shows you that the larger they are, the harder they fall:


Bra-vo! Then, Batman does what we've all dreamed of doing. Bagging Catwoman? No, pimp-slapping Snapper Carr!


Then, from Countdown Arena #4, one of the few good things about this book, an army of almost all the 52 Captain Atoms (except for a couple that died, and Monarch, of course) to face Monarch:


Too bad they all get their quantum asses handed to them, and Monarch absorbs their powers. Next, from Fantastic Four: Isla de la Muerte, we learn who The Thing was with during Civil War:


Sweet Aunt Petunia!!! From the same book, we get the Thing celebrated as a local hero in a Puerto Rico town.


¡Viva! Now, from Giant-Size Avengers V2 #1, Jarvis teaches Thor some manners:


Now that's having some brass ones! And last but not least, coming from the same book, we have Iron Man's last ditch attack protocol:


Very graphic. So, this week's average was just 5.3 Bazzars, pretty low, but I'm just warming up. This column took longer than I expected, partly because I was enjoying my vacation, partly because my home computer is slower than the one at work (and I use the web browser to do a lot of research and such) and partly because I kinda forgot about my "just-write-up-
the-best-dissections-but-count-all-of-them" new policy, as I wanted to get the hang of writing the column again. Next column will be more succinct. That's it for now, until next week, I'll be on the outlook for more dissections, because (almost) nothing escapes...

THE DISSECTOR!