The Dissector

The Dissector #62.

DISCLAIMER (angry creators, please read)

[[WARNING! THIS COLUMN MIGHT CONTAIN SPOILERS!]]

"Great, it's one of those idiotic mental battles. At least there's no wirefr... He already got my arm?" Atomic Robo, Atomic Robo 05 of 06.

Here we are again; still catching up, this time with the books for 02/13. No celebrity deaths to report, at least none you'll know of, or geek-related. Dissect This! was guessed by Snakebyte, who's on a roll, and it was Jay Garrick's chest emblem. The Dissector Picks Of The Week? Well, despite that great quote, Atomic Robo #5 wasn't as good as usual, and I ended up picking New Avengers 38, with a simple tale of a couple falling of over ideologies, as the Best Book Of The Week. The Worst Book Of The Week was New Exiles #2, boring, generic.

Before we move onto the dissections, I read on this week's (03/12) DC Nation all about DC's Senior Pre-Press Artist, Cheryl Smith-Owens, aka "The Princess of Production"; where she tells us about her job, and how she corrects stuff like typos and "basically everything that needs to be right..." Hey, Cheryl, you think you got a job for me over there? That's it, it's dissection time!
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"THE QUESTION LIVES!"

TITLE: Atomic Robo (Red 5 Comics).

ISSUE: 05 of 06.

CULPRIT: Scott Wegener (artist).

DISSECTION: People with no faces. Booo!

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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"WITH THIS RING..."

TITLE: Booster Gold V2 (DC).

ISSUE: 00.

CULPRIT: Dan Jurgens (penciller) and/or Norm Rapmund (finishes).

DISSECTION: Booster's Legion flight ring looks nothing like any LSH flight ring I've ever seen.

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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"PIED DISSECTION."

TITLE: Countdown To Final Crisis (DC).

ISSUE: 11.

CULPRIT: Mike Norton (penciller).

DISSECTION: Check it out below... can you find it? It's hard... By the way, that's Pied Piper.


DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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"HE MIGHT BE SSAAD."

TITLE: Gotham Underground (DC).

ISSUE: 05 of 09.

CULPRIT: Frank Tieri (writer) and/or Travis Lanham (letterer).

DISSECTION: Desaad's name is spelled incorrectly, as "Dessaad".

DISSECT-O-METER: 2 Bazzars.
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"I DECLARE YOU..."

TITLE: Green Arrow/Black Canary (DC).

ISSUE: 05.

CULPRIT: Judd Winick (writer).

DISSECTION: Since when does Wonder Woman have the ability to marry people? I could understand if she could do that in Themyscira, or in the Themysciran embassy (if there was still one)... but in Oliver Queen's house?!?!

DISSECT-O-METER: 6 Bazzars. Also, Red Arrow's hair is colored incorrectly... and not a dissection, but that's the worst Hal Jordan I've ever seen... I didn't even recognize him until I read a review! Would it kill André Coelho to make faces a little more detailed?
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"WHEN CAPTAIN AMERICA THROWS HIS MIGHTY SHIELD... HE CATCHES A DIFFERENT ONE?"

TITLE: Marvel Comics Presents V2 (Marvel).

ISSUE: 06.

CULPRIT: Jeremy Haun (penciller).

DISSECTION: Captain America is shown in June, 1944, jumping from a plane over France (presumably D-Day), carrying his original shield, not the disc-shaped one. Now, all I've seen indicates that his circular shield was given to him by FDR very early in his career, way before 1944. Still, regardless of the date, he's shown here wearing his definitive costume, the one that has a cowl instead of an independent mask (which left the back of his neck exposed); that modification to his costume was made almost at the same time he got the new shield.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars. There are two more errors, including USAgent, as usual.
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"NOT HIM."

TITLE: New Exiles (Marvel).

ISSUE: 02.

CULPRIT: Jordan D. White (assistant editor) and/or Mark Paniccia (senior editor).

DISSECTION: Again, no acknowledgement of Morph not being Morph in the character roster. You'd think that'd be important for readers to know.

DISSECT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars.
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"WHICH ONE IS HE?"

TITLE: New Exiles (Marvel).

ISSUE: 02.

CULPRIT: Chris Claremont (writer) and/or Simon Bowland (letterer).

DISSECTION: Atlantean Warlord Krang is referred to as Kang, which, as you all know, is a completely different character. Or at least, Marvel writers and letterers should know.

DISSECT-O-METER: 7 Bazzars. Yes, it might be a typo, but it turns his name into another character's. Also, Claremont uses the French word "droit", which means "right", as in "are you all right"; when it doesn't have that meaning in French.
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"IT'S A SKRULL!!!!"

TITLE: New Avengers (Marvel).

ISSUE: 38.

CULPRIT: Jose Villarubia (colorist).

DISSECTION: Baby Cage's (Danielle) skin is colored incorrectly, almost the same skin tone as her mother, when it has been shown that she's got definitely darker skin.

DISSECT-O-METER: 4 Bazzars.
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"HOLOCLOTHING."

TITLE: Star Trek: The Next Generation: Intelligence Gathering (IDW).

ISSUE: 02 of 05.

CULPRIT: David Messina.(artist).

DISSECTION: This issue wasn't as bad as the previous one, both in art and in script... however, there are some errors. First of all, and I won't consider this a dissection, but it is kind of weird, Ro Laren is training in a holodeck; not with some outlandish program, but just with sandbags and regular gym equipment; when all Starfleet ships have dedicated gym facilities. But the point is actually the fact that's she's wearing some sort of martial arts outfit; but when the holodeck is turned off, she's wearing her uniform (and not wearing her headband anymore, though she usually wears it).

Every single holodeck episode in any of the three Star Trek shows that have featured such device show us that characters go into the holodeck already dressed for the action; and that if she was wearing clothes generated inside the holodeck, they wouldn't have magically transformed into her uniform; she would have either kept the clothes (I guess you can program the holodeck to do that), or she would have been naked.

DISSECT-O-METER: 8 Bazzars. Also, Messina keeps NOT DRAWING FACES!!!!!
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"THAT'S WHAT I CALL INSIGHT..."

TITLE: Superman V1 (DC).

ISSUE: 673.

CULPRIT: Kurt Busiek (writer).

DISSECTION: Superman frees himself from the Insect Queen's control with.... "AN INTERNAL HEAT-VISION JOLT"?!??!?! WTF?!??!?!?!

DISSECT-O-METER: 10 Bazzars. Also, if it took weeks for the baseball to reach the moon, how is it flying at such a speed to hit the Insect Queen so hard that she makes a crater on the moon surface?
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"HE'S SO FAST HE WRITES HIS NAME ALL TOGETHER."

TITLE: Tiny Titans (DC).

ISSUE: 01.

CULPRIT: Art Baltazar & Franco (writers) and/or Nick J. Napolitano (letterer).

DISSECTION: Funny book, I didn't think I'd like it...but I did (see the Moments Of The Week for an example). However, they wrote "Kidflash" instead of "Kid Flash" in one page.

DISSECT-O-METER: 1 Bazzar.
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Sweet and quick, 18 dissections, for an average of 5.8 Bazzars. Let's get the Moments Of The Week started; first up we have a Blue & Gold banter exchange:


Classic! Then one of those funny-ass moments Atomic Robo has gotten us used to:


Cliché? Yes. Funny? Of course. Then, the Thing show's us why he's suave, despite his rocky exterior:


Then, Sven, from Northlanders, beheads someone:


What, you ask, is so cool? He's BEHEADING a dude!!!!! Now, Gorilla Grodd beats the poop out of Monsieur Mallah... using his Mallah's own lover, The Brain!!!!


Fantastic! (yes, read that word with a Christopher Eccleston Doctor Who accent, please.) Next up; Tiny Titans has the balls to say what we all thought:


Cassie, that is NOT a costume! That's it for now, until next week, I'll be on the outlook for more dissections, because (almost) nothing escapes...

THE DISSECTOR!